Blog #4 Becoming a Young Mom

Tonight I was thinking that maybe I would touch on the subject of becoming a young mother. I hope that this can reach other young mothers, or mothers of these young mothers. I hope that it can reach others that have never been in this situation to understand the position of young girls, and possibly change their point of view or judgement of them.

I became pregnant at the very young age of 18. My oldest, most amazing, wonderful, brilliant, and talented son Dylan was born when I was 19.

Now let me be a mom for a little bit...

Dylan was beautiful. The most beautiful baby. And as he grew and learned, he was smart as a whip. Every new bit of info that he grasped and repeated was amazing. I have a list of words he knew by 12 months and it is super impressive! And it being just the two of us; we shared a bond like no other; and we still do to this day. That boy has my heart in a special way. We kind of "grew up together," and he is my best friend. He is my everything. I wouldn't be who I am today had he not been placed directly in my path when he was.

So let us begin where we should- at the beginning.

I was in school; college; working towards I dont know what; doing what college kids do- having fun, going to parties, and all the good stuff. Now, I could go into detail about how everything went down that night, but I will spare you. I know I had made an "oopsie" but I was a careless freshman in college.

So needless to say, about five weeks later I was buying a home pregnancy test...

It was positive.

I took another the next morning-positive.

Ok...so now what?

You know what? My mom-we were always able to be very open with her; so that day when she called us at home, I told her.

Her first question-"What do you want to do?"

I answered- "I think I want to keep this baby Mom."

I heard a big sigh come from her. She said, "Ok, call the doctor and make an appointment."

My next question-"What about Dad?"

Her answer- "Let me handle your Dad."

So, I made an appointment. My dad quit speaking to me.

It was tough and it was scary.

I stayed in school, I read all the books on pregnancy, and I did everything right. I was determined that if I were going to do this I was going to do it right.

Now let's take a little break...

If anyone ever ends up in this situation with your daughter, please be nothing but supportive. Without the support of my parents, I dont think I would have been able to do this. They were my rock. They were my best friends.

See, as a young girl that gets pregnant, you lose all of that. You lose your friends, you lose your identity; for now you are identifying on an entirely different level that no one can relate to. If you as a mother also are not there for them, they are alone and scared, and what parent wants to do this to their own daughter? It does not by any means mean that you support young, unwedded mothers, but it does however show that love and support for your child, and thats what they need.

My parents told me that they would help me as long as I stayed in school to get an education. I promised I would, and I knew I would keep this promise because I wanted nothing more than to be able to take care of and provide for this baby that I already loved so much.

So I stayed in school; no matter how big my belly grew... and I decided to become a nurse. Back to my dad- well Daddy...even as a 37 year old woman I still call him Daddy. Hes my biggest fan guys, and I love that man more than any words could begin to tell.

I went with my mom to my ultrasound to find out the gender of the baby- also the anatomy scan which is super important. Now let me tell you- this mom of four boys today, was dying for a daughter!!

I dont have to say that they told me it was a boy...

That afternoon, I walked into the house, and my dad spoke to me...He said, "Hows my grandson?"

So some 18 years later this still has me coming to tears. Let me tell you that my dad and Dylan have a bond like no other... and God knows that my Dylan was sent to me at the perfect time.

My parents did support me! My mom was there through the gruesome almost 20 hours of labor; supporting me and being there when I didnt think I could do it anymore. I finished nursing school, and after Dylan was born I knew I wanted nothing more than to be a labor and delivery nurse- which I did for 12 years...

Because of the support from my parents, I am where I am now. They loved me unconditionally even when it was hard, because thats what parents do. I can say thank you three million times and it wouldnt be enough.

Everything happens for a reason. Maybe in my next blog I will explain just why a pregnancy literally saved my life- and yes, I am saying, Dylan saved my life.

Dylan- I know you have been reading my blogs buddy... I love you more than life, and I am here because of you.

Support your kiddos guys. Even if its not the dream you had planned out for them, it doesnt mean that everything has gone wrong. Many blessings come in disguise. Our kids are all we have, and at moments we may not know, but we may be all they have too.

Be open, be loving, dont judge, and be the open arms that hold them when they are scared.

These are our kids...they need us at their worst; and the worst is maybe not sometimes our best.

Never forget that they are here and we promised to always stand behind them.

Kiss your babies!